Bemads Blog » Feelings

Just What Exactly Is Motivation?

Sun, 27 Jun 2010 13:17:24 +0000

What exactly is motivation? Everyone does not always define motivation the exact same way.

Some people describe motivation as a mental force that drives a person to accomplish an end such as finishing a project or saving for retirement.

Some people say that motivation is why some individuals do one thing and others do something all together different. Motivation is often discussed in terms of setting and achieving goals and also what determines the behaviour of a human being.

Motivation is sometimes defined in terms of feelings that push a person to achieve a given objective.

Often motivation is believed to be the reason that a person chooses to do anything in particular, whether it be applying for a specific job or taking a chance by asking someone out on a date.

In the realm of psychology, motivation is closely connected to behaviour in terms of the initiation as well as direction, intensity and persistence of it.

Motivation has to do with having the interest in doing something and then having the willingness and ability to see it through to completion.

Motivation however is not the same as emotion or personality. Motivation is instead a dynamic and temporal state of mind.

A person who is motivated can be motivated to accomplish a long-term goal or a short-term goal and both have value.

Sometimes a motivated individual will break a long-term goal down into a series of smaller short-term goals in order to make the end result easier to reach for and attain.

The motivation to work towards any given goal can change and often times circumstances make it necessary for a person to modify their level of motivation.

An individual’s personality on the other hand is basically a permanent part of the characteristics of the person that does not change.

Aspects of a person’s personality include such things as whether the person is introverted or extroverted, modest, conscientious, shy, loud and so on.

Emotions are temporary states that a person finds themselves in in order to cope with immediate circumstances, such as feeling sad, happy, frustrated, confused, anger and being in a state of grief.

Emotion does not automatically correlate with behaviour whereas motivation does.

Motivation is often broken down into two categories, that of intrinsic motivation and extrinsic motivation.

Intrinsic motivation occurs when the desire to do something comes from within a person and there is no obvious external incentive for it to take place.

Engaging in a hobby for pure enjoyment such as painting, making toy models, stamp collecting, scrap booking etc. are examples of intrinsic motivation. A great deal of research studies have been conducted on intrinsic motivation since the 1970s.

Extrinsic motivation is when there is an external factor present that serves as an incentive for behaviour.

This is commonly viewed in workplaces where employees are motivated by their superiors by being offered tangible rewards such as extra money or a promotion.

There are also intangible rewards which are things such as being praised for a job well done or receiving public acknowledgement for your efforts. Many people respond well to both tangible as well as intangible extrinsic motivation.

Charles Williams is a writer for http://www.lsft.org
which is an excellent place to find Motivation and Self Improvment links,
For more information go to:www.lsft.org
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Maintaining A Healthy Level Of Closeness With Your Children

Robbie — Tue, 18 May 2010 08:23:49 +0000

Maintaining A Healthy Level Of Closeness With Your Children

Parents are very important to all of us. Every one of us loves our parents, and they happen to be the most important persons in our lives. Our parents are the two people who love us unconditionally and who support us in everything. Being a parent is a very nice experience. Most people enjoy their parenthood a lot. Parents love their kids a lot and they enjoy seeing their kids growing up. These feelings are reciprocated by the children with the same intensity. This creates the beauty of the family life. The family unit is a very important unit.

Those nations in which people still prefer to live as a family are more peaceful, and the crime rate is less in those countries. Still, the countries which do not have the culture in which lots of importance is given to the family unit are richer and economically more stable as people become independent in those cultures and everyone has to earn to support by themselves. Family units are important to all as they are a very important factor which shapes the personality of every one. The experiences you have with your family are the determining factors which make up your personality. Family unit is important in more than one sense.

It is a very important part of the culture. We can see different types of family units existing in different parts of the world. The importance and value of a united family unit has changed from the past. Now the life we spend as a family is very different from what a family spent some five decades back. Due to the fast pace of life and so much of innovation going on it is a must that people invest their time with their family to make their family unit very strong.

Parents are the most important persons in the family. The parents are the two people to whom the kids look up to. They respect their parents for what they are and all the family member share unconditional love in the ideal situation. But it is not necessary that this situation keeps on prevailing at all times. With so many things out there which can gather the attention of your kids, it is a must that you pay all due attention to the problems of your family life. The most important aspect in this regard is to be close to your kids. Your children need you the most, and so you must develop close ties with your children to make your family an ideal happy family.

The relationship you can develop with your children is dependent on the ages of your children. The most important point is that these relationships do not develop over night. You have to struggle a lot to develop your relationships with your children. You need to make them trust you. This is important. If they start trusting you and you become successful in befriending them, it will be easier for you and the kids to adjust with each other. The ties will become stronger and your family life will get close to the idea family life.

Parents should be very close to their children. According to the age group of your children you need to treat them in different manners. If your kids are at a school-going age and they are still very much close to their home still, you can befriend them by simply listening to all what they have to say and by answering their questions. When the kids are growing they are sometimes very confused about little things. As parents you can get closer to them you help them with this. Similarly the teenager children need little more care and patience.

You need to give them a bit of confidence as well as some space. It is a bit tricky to handle the girls of that age as well as the boys. The boys are a bit aggressive in that age while the girls are a bit confused. Try to understand them. They will respect you more if you can befriend them.

Five Reasons Why You Should Become A Millionaire And How To Get There

Robbie — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 12:55:14 +0000

Is it fantasy and am I a lunatic? No, this is no pie-in-the-sky dream, instead it’s a movement, a revolution and a powerful one at that! By definition, “movement”; to change position, actions advancing a principle, cause change in those that participate.
I know there will be naysayers and non believers and that’s OK because I’m not talking to you.

However, I know there are those who have vision and a passion for realizing their dreams. Those who have the entrepreneurial spirit and creative mind to see the possibilities and realize the potential in setting this goal.

Imagine just for a moment how it would feel to have everything you wanted in life. What joy and bliss to have the freedom to live life on your terms.

Your success formula will begin by you transforming your thoughts and your mindset to thinking like a millionaire. Millionaires do not focus on lack, they focus on abundance. The more you focus on lack, whether it is money, talent, love or whatever, the less of it you will have. It’s the law of the universe. Remember that your thoughts lead to feelings, feelings lead to actions and actions lead to results. In other words,
Your Thoughts Create Your Life.

The reasons for this “movement” go beyond just making money. As Jim Rohn said, “Set a goal to become a millionaire for what it makes of you to achieve it.”

Aside from the money, five very valid reasons are:
1. You will develop the characteristics of a millionaire.
Millionaires have a positive attitude. They are action takers and they are not afraid of failures or mistakes.
2. Becoming a millionaire will boost the economy and strengthen the middle class. Current economic and world events point to the need that we
become more financially independent.
3. Become a millionaire so that you can teach others to become a millionaire. Schools don’t teach people how to become financially educated
so you have a perfect opportunity to share your knowledge and expertise to potentially thousands of people world wide.
4. Become a millionaire to secure financial freedom for you and your family. Think the government will come to your rescue? Think again.
Oscar Wilde said, When I was young, I used to think that money was the most important thing in life. Now that I am old, I know it is.”
5. Jim Rohn said to become a millionaire because of the person You will become. You will increase your value in the market place, to society and
to your family and to yourself.

How will you get there? You will need a vehicle, in other words, a business, a product or invention, or some other plan you are working on. If you already have the vehicle that’s great. You also need a plan or a road map detailing your exact route.
If you are just beginning and need directions and support, read the business plan that I am using.

See You At The Top!

–
About the Author:
I am Dana Carmichael, entrepreneur and internet business owner. I have a passion for personal development and I am always willing to share knowledge and expertise with others.
I live in Dallas TX. Love the outdoors and being in nature and I love my dogs!
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You Only Have One First

Robbie — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:23:28 +0000

Firsts take courage, a positive frame, a willingness to face fears and sometimes a little push to get through the door. There is nothing like the feeling of getting through a first of any kind to give us affirmation that we can do anything.

Let’s look at these ‘firsts’ and see what we can recall - thoughts, feelings, emotions, what the weather was like, what we wore, who was present – almost a visualization exercise. If you have not experienced these firsts, get ready to think about what feelings and emotions are going to pop into your mind by simply reading about them. Face it – these firsts are days that are made for us to live in the moment and overcome our fears.

My First…

…day at school. What was that like? Can you remember elementary school? High School? Or College/university? You were ready to show the whole world who you were, what you were made of and started to plan where you were going to go next. You were excited, apprehensive and even a little happy to be starting this new part of your life.

…my first job interview. What to say? How do I dress? Will I have to work here for the rest of my life? What questions will they ask? Who will be interviewing me? Feeling like you aced the interview and then didn’t get the job or just the opposite, feeling that you really blew it and did get the job – what a learning experience! And who knew you could ask questions in an interview too – next time you will be more prepared for that one.

…date! OMG! Talk about a scary time. To hold hands or not to, what to wear, what to say, how to act? Dates are where you open yourself up to the biggest part of yourself and others. Imagine how you felt. What other event could make you feel this way? Imagine where this first day could lead – to more dates and a huge future together…or to no more dates, chalking this one up to experience.

…day at work! WOW! What a challenge in front of you? Getting to know your boss, your co-workers and maybe even your competition for the next position on the ladder. Whether it was a job at the local corner store or in that big corporate office, you started to take new steps in new directions. You shed the parts of yourself that you were not happy with and vowed to be the BEST You you could possibly be.

There will always be more firsts ahead of you – move to a new home, move to a new city, travel to new place, joining a community or professional group, speaking engagement, presentation – the list could go on forever! Personal growth and development is more urgent today than ever so use this list when a first comes along:

Be prepared: know time, place, date, how to get there, how to dress, why you are experiencing this ‘first’.
Plan your outlook: do you need to practice or rehearse? Do you need to wear something special? Are you in a positive frame of mind to experience the whole situation? Are you ready to be open and potentially meet new people/circumstances that could change your life?
Practice affirmation: no matter what the results, you will always learn something. Look for the positive in the situation. You are taking a huge step in a new direction – Way to go! Be proud of yourself and remind yourself how awesome you really are!

Be on your way to many ‘firsts’ – HAPPY FIRST….

With over 20 years of business and leadership experience, Lora Crestan offers coaching online through www.solutionlinx.com. Visit today to learn more about Professional Success Coaching and find bring out the leader in you!
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It Is Not Your Teenager, But Probably You Who Needs To Change

Robbie — Wed, 17 Feb 2010 22:01:08 +0000

Why is that parents justify that their child is stepping into teenage, so it is quite natural for him to act like a rebel? Isn’t it possible that your teenager listens to you like he did when he was a toddler?

Let him grow out of your shadow: A teenager is desperate and confused so as to how to assert his identity. And when parents on the top of it try to restrict him, give him instructions, he rebels. Parents should accept that their child has grown up and respect his need for freedom.

Respect his privacy: Let your child spend time in his room by himself or with friends, without time and again expressing displeasure about this fact. Don’t ever try to go through his belongings, spy on his friends, or constantly keep track of his whereabouts. This will disturb your child and make him feel that his parents don’t trust him.

Be a friend to your teenager:

Develop a relationship where your teenaged child feels comfortable to share his feelings with you -may it be on sex, girls, fear of failure or anything, just like he does with his friends. Open communication is a must if you want to help your child in his teenage.

Give him a strong value system: You can’t tell your child all the time what to do and what not to. Let his conscience be powerful enough to guide him. A child, who is brought up in a home where culture, traditions and values are respected and followed, can never go astray.

Be there for your teenager: Parents often feel that now their child is too grown up for hugs or there is no need to express love. But teenage is an age when your child needs you even more. Have warm chats, express your understanding, and assure your child that you’ll love him no matter what. These gestures of love and empathy will bring him closer to you.

For more details visit:

www.womanhoodbyadiva.com

For details visit:
www.mothersprideonline.com www.presidiumonline.com

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Tips to a Successful Marriage-This Valentines Day

Robbie — Sat, 13 Feb 2010 23:13:44 +0000

Tips to a Successful Marriage
By Gabriella Gometra
You start to yell at your husband and tell him that you are mad at him because he does not do his work, he does not care for you, and most of all, and he does not understand your feelings. Yet, your husband stands in front of you patiently waiting for you to stop then says “Yes, I do not understand you. I am sorry.”

Sometimes no matter how right you think you are in a particular thing, you will always have to face the fact that you can sometimes think wrong. In a marriage, probably the most challenging part is keeping your relationship intact. With the presence of temptations in almost all the corners in town, a married couple must go an extra mile in effort to stay strong. Here are a few useful tips for a happy marriage.

Learn the Value of Listening and Trust
If you are very mad at your partner because your friend told you that he is seeing another woman, your first instincts may be to make a scene and tell him how much that hurts you. But before you do, breathe deeply and think about this: not all you hear is true, even if it was said by your closest friend. Check the facts for yourself and clarify things with your husband in a friendly manner. Trust him with all of your heart because without trust, you will always find a reason to fight.

Do Not Think Of the Time
Sometimes, when you are in a relationship for quite sometime already, you tend to feel bored with each other’s company, and you start to fall out of love. When this happens, do not panic and do impractical things to try to renew the spark again. Do not confuse being comfortable with a lack of passion and love. One point of advice is to try to do what both of you did during your early years so that your hearts will remember your early feelings.

Boost Your Love
When you have a stable relationship, do not forget to do things that will boost your partner’s love for you. Remember to express appreciation and do little extra things for them that they do not expect every day. Consider surprising your spouse with a bouquet of flowers or invite him or her to watch their favorite movie with you.

Marriage is more than just being tied to each other. It is the symbol of your vow to love each other at all costs, for better or for worse. Never let petty misunderstandings ruin your relationship and remember that you promised that only “till death do you part.”

Gabriella Gometra, stay-at-home mother and writer, builds sites on a diverse number of topics, such as bike messenger bags and the Dickies messenger bag.

Why You Don’t Want To Get Over Betrayal

Robbie — Sun, 10 Jan 2010 23:03:52 +0000

If you wish to to acknowledge what to do to forget your ex that there is no easy answer for this|you gotta know that it’s not easy|you better be ready to face the reality|you need to understand that it can be fainful|the process can be long}. No one can right away resolve your questions because no matter how easy you are to advance you will still experience pain. As many have experienced it, it is usually a sensitive treat that you have to handle. Most frequently it is boring treat and you should be prepared to treat it properly. Sometimes you believe that you have mastered it but the truth is you are not. If somebody or something reminded you of your ex you would eventually experience sadness and annoyance over again. It doesn’t mean that you over ex yet.

Click – Secrets to Get Over BreakUp Quickly
.

LINKS IN ARTICLES ARE PUT THEIR BY THE AUTHOR & ARE NOT ENDORSED -GOOD OR BAD BY THIS BLOG

If relationship was the most important thing and terminate it, it will certainly affect your feelings that can make you hopeless for long time, sometimes even if you start a new relationship. You require to fight back for the emotion to keep off feeling low and ruining your future as well. Avoid getting into depression cause that is not what you want to experience during break up. To get over with someone is the immediate thought that you should be thinking of promptly the break ups. The worst section of breakup is after through thinking it will make you ask how to forget your ex whom you can’t leave without.

If this is the first time an break up is fresh usually the only way to tackle it is just to face up the anguish and go with it. This situation can be severe and there is nothing you can do about it. You need to get something that can diminish the pain. One thing you can practice is to move out all that will remind you of ex. Films and other matters that are open in your home should be got rid of. If you can give the items away place them where you can’t have access to them. If not you can store it at the store. Most individuals who are in the same situation as you struggle to find a solution.

If you are getting troubles dealing with breakup, it would be appropriate if you ask for directions and help of a person you trust. By doing this you you are most likely to overcome the trouble without going into serious problem.This will help you to go through this quickly. Professional and expert can quickly assist you out with this make a point that you observe what they say and you will be surprised that you were able to overcome it. Talk to your family and friends, getting it out is the best way to do it. Time will come you will awaken feeling right and ready to face the world again. Your good friends will help in dealing with the pain, Gather with people you love to heal faster. It is essential that you have a person whom you can depend into if you are disturbed from pain and sadness.

On this article I referred to a step by step plan to follow that almost guarantees getting over your ex. You can get it here: Forget Break Up Even If You Think You Can’t.! If you are tired and want to change your life, this information will outline for you everything you need to do to forget your ex and move on into your life.

Article Source:http://www.articlesbase.com/self-improvement-articles/why-you-dont-want-to-get-over-betrayal-1690027.html

How do i help my friend get over her ex boyfriend so i can date

Robbie — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 00:24:43 +0000

I can not get over him fast.
I know how you feel. More than anyone, I recognise just how you you’re feeling. It is a dark, sad spot you are in. Almost like a close tunnel in which you can barely take a breath and the light at the end has disappeared. From all my own experiences, let me first say, you can get over him quickly, things will get easier, you will see someone new and you are more than worthy of both happiness and love.

CLICK HERE – Advice to Get Over Ex Boyfriend Completely

You may ask yourself why you can t get over him? Do not feel badly that you are still not over this guy. Everyone says time is the best healer, and while that may have some truth to it, it?s a guideline, not a guaranty. And I know that when you experience a breakup, it feels like the people around you give you an unspoken time-limit in which to get over a guy. They will be kind and agreement awhile, but when you?ve reached the level where they believe you should be over it, they seem to stop listening. And this simply causes you feel alone in your emotions and like a loser for not being able to get past it earlier.

Everyone cures at his or her own tempo. One weeks may feel long time to one individual, but for you, the wounds are still clean and the scars still severe. And it does not count that you never had a traditional boyfriend or girlfriend relationship because physically and emotionally, the attachment between you two was intense and your feelings and emotions ran very deep. You are not a loser. You are a human being. Empathize that, accept that.

If your ex boyfriend broke up with you then it is time that you mended it. Even though he always on your mind, you must forget him. You can stop thinking about your ex and be over him completely in less than 24 hours. For more secrets about ways to get over him quickly click our link.

Article Source:http://www.articlesbase.com/motivational-articles/how-do-i-help-my-friend-get-over-her-ex-boyfriend-so-i-can-date-1628925.html

How changing your routine can change your life

Robbie — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 17:36:21 +0000

It is hard to tell where we are going wrong in life sometimes. After all, you may be feeling unhappy even when you have some of the trappings of normal life such as a job, a home, a relationship e.t.c. That is because fulfilment is relative to the individual. What I mean by that that just because you have reached a ‘normal ‘ level of success does not necessarily mean you are going to be content if you have not fulfilled your own potential.
So how can we change theses feelings ? How might we get out of the rut we find ourselves in from time to time
There is one way to tell if you are stuck in a rut or not, it is by looking at the condition of your life next to the patterns of your behaviour. In other words look at the habits you have been unwilling to change that may be preventing you from taking the next step in your life.

So lets’ think about this concept of habit a bit more closely. Habit is a form of behaviour that automatically directs your activity with out the need for conscious thought. There are minor habits such as nail biting, that we all have. Then there are extreme habits that begin to take the form of OCD. But you may be surprised to know that in our day to day lives we are constantly behaving due to established habits. These habits are what form our personality.
This makes sense after all our personalities are what make us what we are. It would be very confusing of we kept changing all the time. The only problem is that people accept who they are is something that is unchangeable. All to often we look to change our circumstances without looking at the root causes of our situation- ourselves ! Specifically the way that we think.
For instance, take the example of the former burglar and drug addict who comes out of prison and changes his life around. One day he walks past an open window on the ground floor of an empty house. There is no one else around he could easily climb through and take what he wants. He walks up to the window but on this occasion he closes it for the owner and walks away. Whereas once he would have looked at the window and experienced the emotions of an opportunity – now these feelings are no longer there- You see, not only has he changed his behaviour but now he has changed the way he thinks about the environment he is in. His environment , his world has not changed but the way that he chooses to interact with it has.

Now I am not suggesting here that the only way to change your life is to go to prison! But on a serious note this example shows the difference you can make to your life if you change the way you choose to interact with the world. Basically our habits are not something set in stone they can be broken and replaced with whatever habits we want so long as we possess the will to change them.
Fortunately there are ways to speed up the process of changing your mental habits and it starts in the imagination. The imagination is the most powerful mental force in our possession. Indeed it is from the imagination that man created the first cars and came up with audacity to land someone on the moon. Of course it is also in the imagination that our hopes and dreams first appear. Harnessing the power behind these hopes and dreams is the first step to changing our habits.
So to begin, sit yourself down in a quiet room somewhere comfortable and think about a goal you want to achieve. Lets say it is a promotion at work, now let’s think about the aspects of your personality that are currently holding you back. Whether this is fear of the unknown or anxiety begin to imagine yourself in the opposite way. For 15-20 minutes play a little mind movie in your head where you are self assured and self confident. Experience the positive emotions that this brings. In essence, live the dream to become the dream.

The power of thought is not to be underestimated. By playing a scenario in your mind not only are you forming positive mental habits – but you are also rehearsing for the big moment leaving you more assured and confident in your new abilities.

Andrew James offers a no cost video showing you step-by-step how to overcome negative thinking patterns. please visit
www.stopthenegativewaves.com

Article Source:http://www.articlesbase.com/motivational-articles/how-changing-your-routine-can-change-your-life-1470582.html

Great Self Help Tips For Overcoming Low Self Esteem

Robbie — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 05:06:09 +0000

Self esteem is defined as the way people perceive themselves, or rather, how they gauge their self worth. This “self perception” includes how they perceive their emotions, beliefs, and feelings at any one given time. It has a direct impact on the way people think, feel, and interact amongst other people, and the choices they make are also directly linked to the level of self esteem they have at that particular point in time.

So it is definitely important that we know the underlying factors that may affect our level of self esteem. Low self esteem has become a prevalent problem in modern times, especially considering our busy schedules and the state of the world as we know it. But the factors that affect self esteem may be different for each individual. As we move through the various stages in our lives we may experience different stresses, different situations that may cause the level of our self esteem to alter. This level of self esteem is often affected by the relationships we have with other people, because it is only natural for us that we want ourselves to be valued in the eyes of others.

Let’s face it, how many of us are guilty of comparing ourselves with others? Whether it’s in terms of success or even just how slim the other person is, we may have envied another person enough to become negative to ourselves. Some people obsess over this, and eventually fall into a state of depression as they berate themselves for not being successful enough, thin enough, smart enough, loved enough, etc.

If you are guilty of this, then here’s a suggestion: STOP!

You are special in your own way, you have abilities and traits that make you unique, and you don’t have to be someone else just to feel good.

Learn to love yourself, and you will soon see that it’s quite alright that you’re not the person you admire or envy. Personal success comes differently for each individual. However, before you can think of achieving that personal success, it is important for you to know how to build your self esteem so you can have the confidence to go after the success that you crave.

How do you build your self esteem then?

Remember the word “self” in self esteem. It is all about YOU. Forget about what others perceive of you; if you want to be more confident, you need to change the way you perceive yourself. Self esteem comes from within, not without, so while it may be difficult for you to change your self perspective over night, you can however take small baby steps to get yourself in the right direction, and eventually you will become a more confident person as you build an impenetrable sense of self worth.

You need to eliminate self doubt and all self destructive beliefs. Doubting yourself will get you nowhere, in fact it will only limit your chances of success. Take criticism in stride, and shrug off anything you may feel to be negative or derogatory. Be assertive in the way you accept criticism, thank the one who may critique you in a negative way, and then brush off the negativity. Keep yourself physically and mentally fit. With a sound mind and body, it would be easier for you to feel good about yourself. Exude confidence even if you don’t feel like it on any given day. Take care of yourself and set aside some time just for yourself so you can get a clear head when you need it.

Click Here to grab your FREE “Unleashing Your Inner Confidence In 5 Easy Steps” Report. Achieve success in life with these proven and tested techniques to allow yourself to be more confident in anything you do.

Article Source:http://www.articlesbase.com/motivational-articles/great-self-help-tips-for-overcoming-low-self-esteem-1462388.html