Feeling lonely all the time does not have to be a way of life. The conventional myth is that older people living alone because of divorce or the loss of a spouse are the loneliest of all people. Research shows that a young person with not significant relationship, who is living at home with parents, is lonelier than a senor living alone. For a young person being alone on a Saturday night can be a stigma.

Lonely people generally react in one of two ways. In a sad passive way, spending much of their time sleeping, eating, and crying. The other way to use the alone time is in a creative way, reading, learning new skills, working on a hobby or listening to music. People who spend their alone time in creative activities replace the feeling of being lonely with one of self satisfaction.

We allow ourselves to feel lonely. Loneliness is often another term for boredom. Those who spend their time being creative have learned to cope with solitude. Seniors adjust easier to being alone because they have grown more secure in knowing who they are. When you find yourself alone you should see it as an opportunity to discover yourself. Learn what you want of yourself, where you would like to go, and what brings you happiness.

It is our outer self that deals with family, friends, culture and all other parts of civilization. We compromise the outer self to avoid conflict with those around us. But the inner self is the true self and those who are in touch with their inner selves have a true sense of identity. By knowing your true inner self you can modify your outer self to better interact with others.

There are ways to deal with loneliness Another thing you can do when you are feeling lonely is start something new. This is an effective way to shift your focus on something other than being lonely. Start a new hobby or take some adult classes at your local community college where you will meet new people. You can start volunteering at a local shelter or hospital – anything that allows you to place your attention and focus on something else. When you can become passionate about something other than your divorce or your loneliness, it’s a great way to start the healing process.

People who are loving, who completely accept themselves and others can be happy and content in a crowd or quietly at home by themselves. Feelings of loneliness, depression and boredom are the result of affection deprivation. The sign that someone is heading in the wrong direction is self – preoccupation.

Start thinking about others first. If you wish to receive affection you have to become consciously aware of the people you feel affection for. When you focus attention on someone else, you feel better about yourself.The key to warding off loneliness is caring for yourself, for what you really feel, caring for others, caring for life and everything around you.

Feeling lonely is a diversion that takes your attention away from planning creative activities for yourself. Seeking companionship or a sense of belonging is an emotional hunger that we all have. You years of life experience can be used doing volunteer work, participating in organizations, which in turn will fill your need for companionship and self satisfaction.

Help For Seniors is a web site dedicated to keeping Senior Citizens informed about issues of Money, Health and Relationships. Help For Seniors

Article Source:http://www.articlesbase.com/motivational-articles/you-can-over-come-your-feeling-of-loneliness-1523744.html

On Taking Risks

           When I was growing up, my father used to wag his finger at me every so often and admonish:  “Don’t take any risks.”  He was not one to even risk a short step up in order to get ahead or improve his life, because he believed that was too much of a gamble.  Consequently, he stayed in the same dull job, earning a lowly salary, for over forty years.  On top of that, he tolerated way too much verbal abuse from his boss, and all for the sake of a secure monthly income that never stretched far enough. 

            Also, it wasn’t important to my father whether the work one did was enjoyable or fulfilling.  That would have been the very least item he considered.  In my father’s value system, if you were making good money, then you could tolerate the boredom.  It was okay.

            When I graduated high school, I went off and copied my father’s lifestyle.  I got a clerical job in an office and earned a less than adequate salary doing work that did not interest me.  Eventually, I became a legal secretary, then a legal assistant, earning just enough to cover basic expenses.  And I stayed with such work almost my entire working life.  My father’s message had sunk in deeper than the ocean floor. 

            I’ve long since come to see that my father’s value system was badly skewed.  That may have been because of his experiences during the Great Depression.  I don’t know; but, nevertheless, I eventually came to understand that those values do not bring rewards.

            With just a cursory glance over today’s flattening economy and discouraging job market, I now realize that the age-old search for security and permanence is truly a wisp of a dream.  Putting all one’s faith in the stock market, or any type of investments, or in bank accounts, or anything like that, is like trusting the ground under your feet to always remain steady.  An earthquake can come along, and even the ground under one’s feet will give way. 

            The idea that you have security when you have money in the bank or a nice investment portfolio is a delusion.  The truth is there is no security anywhere in this world.  What looks good today can turn into tomorrow’s lost cause.  This is a world of impermanence and constant change.  You’re up today and down tomorrow, as they like to say in show biz.

            The truth is that all you can really count on is ‘you.’  Your own ever-present creativity, ingenuity, imagination, and intelligence can never disappoint.  Only these are constants.  Too many make the mistake of putting all their faith in such things as government bonds or 401k’s, and so on.  But these things are so fragile and fluctuate all the time.  We know that, so why do we still put so much trust in them?

            Consider those people who worked for decades at a company, only to find in the end that their pensions were gone?  I wonder if they learned the hard lesson being given.  Because there is a lesson here, and the lesson is that nothing in the material world is permanent or dependable.  I like what General Douglas MacArthur once said:  “There is no security, only opportunity.”  Opportunity is always available.  It exists abundantly as opposed to security, which actually is non-existent.

            Life offers no guarantees.  That’s an ancient axiom that has been repeated countless times down through the centuries.  All you have is you.  And that is a tremendous lot.  It is more than enough.  While you still live and breathe, you still possess all the great attributes that got your forefathers out of the caves to create civilization.  How do you think your ancestors managed to survive in a world full of wildlife that had sharper teeth, long fangs and claws, tusks, poisonous sacs, and brute strength and endurance?  It was human creativity and ingenuity, coupled with imagination and intelligence, that saved them from extinction. 

            So, in this sluggish economy where jobs are hard to come by, you will find a way to survive given the assets you possess.  There are still so many needs to be met, waiting for discoveries and inventions that will improve the quality of life.  Further, new ideas are forever welcome so that our perspectives can be elevated. Possibilities are endless.  It has always been thus.  Possibility and opportunity can never be depleted.

            But you have to be willing to risk.  That just seems to be a law of life.  Nothing much is ever gained without some risk.   Yes, risking can be dangerous, as my father well understood.  You can lose quite a lot.  You can lose time and money and many other kinds of resources.  We call this latter failure, which has become a dirty word.  But it isn’t really.  Because it’s from our failures that we learn how to find the road to success.  Risk is always worth its price.  One reason I say this is because if you are determined and don’t give up, you are sure to attain success.  Risk can be thought of as some god who is testing your endurance and courage.

            Too many in this society have been grasping for a long time now for what looked like the gold ring.  We worshipped at the alter of security, particularly financial security, which has come to mean a home in the right area of town; comfortable financial assets; the right car, the right spouse, the right lifestyle, the right this and the right that.  In other words, the so-called ‘good life.’  And to attain this ‘good life,’ we have too often sacrificed our real desires and longings, our desire for adventure and our desire to express our own self in our own unique way.  Instead, we wanted so much to fit in and be made welcome by our neighbors.  This has led to widespread unhappiness that has frequently resulted in depression and anxiety, as well as alcoholism or drug addiction. 

            When we frustrate our natural inner urge to express, we pay a stiff price.

            So, in a listless economy where jobs are hard to come by, especially jobs that pay an attractive salary, all we have to fall back on is our own inner resources.  Yes, I know, you can collect unemployment insurance and that can tide you over if you’re careful with your money; but that will also insure a long-term stagnation for you as well.  What is needed at this time is creativity and ingenuity, along with intelligence and imagination in order to go forward and reach for something much better than just a job. 

            We need to grow our own lives, as well as the national economy.

 

Sandra L. Lerner is the author of Connecting with Your Guardian Angel. See www.connectingwithyourguardianangel.com.
She also has written several articles on various topics that have been published on the web.

Article Source:http://www.articlesbase.com/motivational-articles/on-taking-risks-1496552.html

The fat whale tale


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Santa's a cummin to town

It’s Christmas season again don’t forget to give your child or grand child
the greatest free gift they will never forget…A FREE SANTA LETTER

How does it work? go here and
fill in a few details only your child knows after your happy with your handy
work print the letter out put it into an envelope with the childs name and
address on the front and wack a simple postage stamp on it and presto
wait for the mail man and the fun to arrive you will not be disappointed.

Now todays post….The fat whale tale

Two California blue whales were hanging out in the deep sea. They were both in their mid twenties and had been friends since they were babies. Even thought they were best mates, they were very different.

Moby spend ages in the depths of the sea, just lazing about and taking naps. She didn’t really like making the two hundred metre trip to the surface, and seldom came up for oxygen.

Noah enjoyed coming up to the surface often, playing with other sea creatures, taking part in spraying competitions. Through practice she was able to shoot spray as far as three stories high!

Moby loved to eat just about anything that got in her way: Krill, plankton, all types of fish… she would gorge up to nine tons per day, sometimes even ten. Not because she was hungry, but out of boredom and unconsciousness. And at twenty five, she weighed almost two hundred tons.

Noah, on the other hand, was a picky eater. She ate only the finest micro-organisms and never allowed herself to get too full, as she liked feeling light and being able to move freely.

Noah tried to involve Moby in her many trips to the surface as she thought the extra oxygen and exercise would do her good. But Moby always had an excuse. She was too tired or too busy to make the effort.

One day, on one of their many migratory trips to Costa Rica, the two whales somehow lost touch. Noah swam so beautifully and effortlessly that Moby just couldn’t keep up. She stayed back with the older whales, which ended up migrating to a different location. After that, the two friends didn’t see each other for a long time.

Twenty years or so later, at an Endangered Species Summit, the two friends bumped into each other.

- Noah, where were you all this time?  By Calipso, you have changed! Look at you, you grew longer than a basketball court! You look amazing! And what about your skin markings, you are positively glowing!

- My dear cow (a cow is a female whale), it’s great to see you again! I am doing great. In fact, I am on my way to the Spraying Olimpic Games to represent blue whales. But how are you doing? Your skin colour looks greyish and dull. Are you ok? You must have put on about twenty elephants in weight since I last saw you!

- Yes, I don’t feel good at all, my friend. The doctor reckons I have about five years to live, if that. I can’t migrate anymore as my weight gets in the way. My low frequency sounds are practically undetectable, and I get lost all the time. I am really afraid I am going to get killed by man.  I don’t know how this happened to me. I must have really bad genes…

What you do now determines the results you will get in the future. Let this tale of two whale friends inspire you to take action now. Go get healthy!

Anna Aparicio

http://www.delite.ie

Anna Aparicio is a IINLP Accredited Life & Succes Coach. She specialises in helping you get what you want quickly and effectively.

Anna has featured on RTE’s The Afternoon Show as The Confidence Coach.

Find out more about her unique style of coaching at:
http://www.delite,
and her blog: http://delitelifesolutions.wordpress.com

Article Source:http://www.articlesbase.com/motivational-articles/the-fat-whale-tale-1424324.html

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