In astrology, Mars is the planet most connected with anger, but Mars in and of itself doesn’t create anger. Its position in the birth chart shows the places where we’re moved to protect what is important to us, including some of our illusions. Nothing makes us madder than some darned fool telling us the truth!
If we grew up in dysfunctional families, in order to survive our upbringing, we learned to be highly sensitive, reactive, and always on the alert for a threat to the status quo. Thus, we tend to be easily wounded by even the gentlest reminder of the shortcomings of ourselves, our families, or other codependent ties. We may react with rage to even the most constructive of criticisms. In order to protect our denial, we may go so far as to sever relationships with people who are unwise enough to rock the boat with the facts. (No one said we were easy to live with!)
Anger is the guard dog of denial. In some cases, the denial is so strong or the ego so vulnerable that anger is a pit bull. Do you resent people who puncture your illusions, threaten your denial about your own or loved one’s addictions or destructive behaviors, or make you face up to your shortcomings? Do you respond by closing down, running away, or cutting off the relationship? If so, you short-circuit your own growth and deny yourself real intimacy with others, an intimacy based on mutual honesty.
Anger keeps the past alive. Family difficulties that created a painful childhood are often present when the outer planets are strong in the 10th, 4th, or 1st houses. In the course of our lives, we who come from dysfunctional families have had many causes for anger. Terrible things may have happened to us and to other family members because of our parents’ problems. As adults, because many of us didn’t know how to assert ourselves, we may play out the victim role. Our conditioned reaction patterns can leave a trail of broken relationships.
Anger may be all we have left to connect us to a family member, an old lover, or a former friend. By continuing to hold on to it, we keep the relationship alive and current, at least in our own minds. We make that person or incident very important in our lives and give them enormous power. We’d like to believe we’re still as important to them–not accepting that they may barely think of us at all any more.
The more energy we invest in the past in the form of anger, the less energy we have available for more intimacy and a better life today. It’s like putting a militia to work guarding a cemetery, when the same labor force could have built a new road. Are you wasting energy on anger at someone or something else, when you could be building a future for yourself? Isn’t that just another way to take the focus off yourself? Rehashing old war stories may even be a ruse for avoiding facing intimacy. When you’re angry, it may help to ask yourself the following questions:
How do I use anger to protect my denial?
Am I willing to let go of anger about things that happened in the past so I can build a better life for myself today?
Am I willing to give up Being Right in order to be happier?
Mars is the planet of energy and of action. When we go through periods of continuous anger–days and nights when the same rageful thoughts churn over and over in our minds–this is a clear signal from the Higher Self that we need to take action. We need to DO SOMETHING about the condition that is making us uncomfortable. Anger is the body-mind’s way of mobilizing against a threatening, frustrating, or adverse situation. It motivates us to change something in our lives. Often, the needed change involves the quality of our key relationships.
Anger is not unhealthy in itself, but our reactions to it often are. In troubled families, we learned to suppress it in order to survive. Many of us eat, drink, overspend, or use drugs to force it back down (Mars-Neptune aspects), or we put a great deal of energy into controlling behaviors that we think will preserve our relationships (Mars-Pluto aspects) but wind up contaminating them. Some of us redirect anger to safer, seemingly weaker targets and wreak havoc in our relationships. All too many of us turn it in on ourselves, creating depression and self-hate. Do you suppress and subvert your own anger?
At those times when anger looks like it has moved in to stay, ask yourself what action you’re avoiding. Rageful thoughts that repeat like a broken record are the Higher Self’s way of needling us about something that needs to be done. The first step is to bless the part of yourself that is using this signal to get your attention. Rather than judging it or pushing it down, let it help you identify what needs to be changed. Ask yourself, “What part of my life is my anger trying to mobilize me to change?” Some affirmations you could say are, “I accept my anger as a healthy, motivating force,” and “I allow my anger to lead me to the truth.”
Anger can be a great spur to creative problem solving. Maybe you already know what needs to be changed. The things that make you angry are all too glaringly clear, and the conditions that need to be changed stares you in the face every day but you just don’t know where to begin. Think about the variety of ways to approach the situation. Use your creativity to go beyond the obvious. Mayhem is not the answer, but neither is withdrawal from people and situations that evoke anger.
If you want to use the experience of anger for your own growth, there are some steps you can take. Put aside for the moment way the hurtful comment was spoken. Even put aside the intention of the person who said it. Now ask yourself the following questions:
Is there any truth in what this person is saying?
If so, what can I learn from it that will make me a better person?
If not, what is his or her problem?
Posing this series of questions in situations when you’re angry can become a spiritual discipline with great rewards for personal growth and relationships with others. If you’re moved to try them, the truth shall once more set you free, this time of anger. An excellent book on using anger for growth and reconciliation is Buddhist teacher, Thich Nhat Hahn’s, Anger: Wisdom for Cooling the Flames. (Riverhead Books, 2001)
The position of Mars in the birth chart can often represent a part of our lives where we are quick to anger and to conflict with others, but Mars is not the CAUSE of our anger. Rather it can represent an area where we have blind spots and would prefer to remain in denial. This article poses a series of questions we can ask ourselves about our own “hot spots” so that we can learn from incidents where we’ve gotten angry and then can grow past them.
Used more consciously, a thorough understanding of Mars’ place in the astrology chart can be a tool for anger management. An astrological consultation by a seasoned astrologer, preferably one with a psychological background, can be a great spur for growth and for reducing the level of conflict in your relationships.
©2009 by Donna Cunningham, MSW
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Note: This has been an excerpt from Donna Cunningham’s ebook, Outer Planet Aspects to Venus and Mars: The Outer Planets and Inner Life, Volume 2. Donna is an internationally respected astrologer with over 40 years experience, is the author of 15 books on metaphysical topics and has a Master’s Degree in Social Work from Columbia University. She teaches writing by teleseminar and correspondence course, as well as a correspondence course and seminars on astrology. Order her books at http://www.moonmavenpublications.com/astrologybooks.html and visit her award-winning blog at http://skywriter.wordpress.com
A bit of humor...
Powered By WPHumor
Please Note... All links within articles are placed by their author-owners and not by this blog.Products with in those links may or may not be the best in the world.If it sounds too good to be true it could be a scam.Articles are posted for their info,ideas and or entertainment value only.
Powered By WP Footer
