There is no human being in this world that doesn’t get angry. It’s normal, healthy even to express it. It is a fact that repressing it can manifest into a lot of negative things. It can affect your health, your feelings and the way you think. If these factors are affected, clearly your relationship with your friends, family and partner will be affected. What’s worst is that if pent up bitterness explodes; it can be very intense that it can really hurt the person you direct your resentment at. If you irresponsibly pour out your rage, it can have detrimental consequences in your relationship.
The thing with impulsively showing your rage is that, once you did it, you calm down and regret it. And before you know it, it’s too late to say your apologies. On the other hand, if you can control it, the outcome can be very helpful- to yourself and your relationships. You see, it’s not only in mushy things that you can express your intimacy but through anger as well. Expressing your deep seated resentment is very personal; it’s like showing all the skeletons in your closets. You expose your fears, your insecurities and your vulnerability. That is why it is important to know proper anger management techniques because it can improve or even save not just yourself but your relationship as well.
Consider these anger management techniques as a reminder because these are common instructions but are rarely practiced. One of the anger management techniques that I would like to remind you is to do it at the right time and at the right place. It doesn’t matter if you have all the reasons to be angry but if you were the one seen screaming like a crazy person in public, you still end up as the bad guy. Plus, some people are very sensitive when it comes to being embarrassed in public. One couple I know end up divorcing each other because a wife cannot contain herself and burst her rage in a restaurant.
Further anger management techniques that I would like to share is having an agreement on how to prevent destructive arguments. For instance, there is this couple I know, they had an agreement that they would give each other five minutes to blurt out all his or her contained fury while the other partner would just listen without being offended. While some couples prefer to have a “time- out” if he or she feels that he/ she is too emotional to be rational in an argument. You can have your own mutual agreement too. Do what works for both of you and be sure that both of you can commit to it.
One of the anger management techniques I believe that can have productive result is to forget blaming. Instead of saying “YOU are an insensitive fool!” say “I feel hurt with what you did” can trigger a more sympathetic nerve that labeling. How to deal with anger depends on each couple to compromise before they are in that situation. Having a discussion on how to deal with anger can save both of you a lot of pain. Anger will always be a part of us, as human beings. We just need to tame it. And if you have a partner that sees through your anger and appreciates or even thanks you for expressing it, then consider yourself lucky.
It’s really a rare find.
The author of this article, Ruth Purple, is a Relationship Expert who has been successfully coaching individuals and couples in their relationships. Get A Copy of her sensational ebook on winning your man back from infidelity. Alternatively click here for Amazon’s Kindle Edition.
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